some shit eye wrote this morning...

Im tired of living this bullshit life making no progress
feels like a condom on my brain
because Im fucking with more nonsense
my guilty conscience-
-being framed for all the wrong things
but if you think I'll stop here,
sorry but eye will NOT quit
eye stay on top like a stock tip
inspired by life's conflicts
to show you kids what hip hop is to me
..hip hop is deep,
like pops' philosophies
you gotta read between my enemy lines
to see what I mean
...and yes, I got dreams
but only half have seen the light of day
other half's been locked away
inside my hiding place
for so long Ive rambled on about how
"I aint got shit to prove"
but with some of those lies you listen to
eye realize.. "eye do"
"with great power comes great responsibility"
so be impeccable with your word
because the world is listening
know the ledge, with no regrets,
plus know your history
and know that there is more to life
than trying to make fifty G's
what's inside means more
than what you represent physically
and I'll hit you in the head with a shovel
if you ain't digging these
words of wisdom (wordlife)
you need to learn to listen
close your eyes for a second
and work with your THIRD vision

Declaration of Hard Word and Determinatoin

Eye Nereo II, artist and poet who aspires to be greater than great, hereby declare that on this day forth, eye shall invest greater care into my art which eye so passionately love with all that is left of my broken heart. For as long as I will strive, I will expand, and grow, which is the ultimate goal. The only thing to do from here on out is to create, and at best...without fear. (at best!)

Fat Jon I love you man

This music feeds my soul. Fat Jon I love you with all my heart

Artist Next Door

I was part of a Television Series called The Artist Next Door. Zoe says I have nice teeth. I think she's insane, but I love her for that.. I feel better about my ugliness . On another note, I think its quite funny how they make edits on these interviews. I like how they show the guy nodding his head, or show a clip of his eyebrows raise up as if to say "whoaaa thats craaazy maaaan"..watch for yourself..

Queens Gambit

For some reason everytime I learn a life lesson,and grow from an experience, whether it be good or bad, I find more and more ways to compare this life lesson to the game of chess.

I remember when I was young and I use to play chess with my dad, he would teach me about all of the pieces on the board, how they move, and what their ranking was, or in other words which one was worth more. The pawn of course, was the weakest piece, but it was necessary to have,(he explained) as it was what helped create a defense for all the stronger pieces. He went through each piece telling me their strengths. Eventually, he got to the queen, and explained that the Queen is the most powerful piece you have, because it can do so much. Unlike the other pieces, it can move in any direction for as many squares as you would like it to. He warned me however, that it is not wise to be on the offense strictly using the Queen. Best offense=greater defense. In other words, what my father was trying to say was " don't get carried away with your Queen".. and the more and more I think back, I realize how much those words of his relate so much to real life.. Chess is a metaphor for life..and that is excatly what came to mind when I wrote...


Father always warned me to watch out for the queens gambit
he said to me son dont put all your eggs into one basket
because once you do that kid..well..THATS IT.
you might as well pack your bags now
and head back to your blank canvas
thee attachment will having you asking for the aspirin pills
day after day complaining how really bad it feels
like maan it kills to be stabbed in the heart
passionately scarred drinking in the back of the bar
thinking of thinking of trying not to think at all
wishing that you never got involved as the bodyguard
but you did..

and now it is what it is

so bid farewell...

but understand ...
its not how you fall in love..

its how you land
time well wasted?? or time well spent??
well I guess it all depends
on you and your two cents
does the shoe fit?? or is it too big??
ask yourself who'se your true friends
because that's who you need to be with
concentrate on your other pieces
because when your queen is gone
balance will be the key in life to keep keeping on
yes keep keeping on..and be strong...
keep keeping on

and BE STRONG.

afraid that I may destory what hasn't even been created yet
I refrain, remain restrained during the painful stretch
aroused but unable to let it out i pout internally
verbally shooting happyfaced opinons while whispering secret love notes
Im lovestruck

45 Degrees below surrounded by this cold, knee-deep snow....I am here...day dreaming of that tropical weather now more than everhoping that the memories will melt my frozen tears.
I speak for myself when I say that I feel more at home in the Philippines, than I do here in Canada, but regardless of my sense of belonging, there is no denying the fact that my flesh and bone were born here in the West. I am a Canadian-Filipino, and as simple as it sounds, it took me 22 years to figure that out.
While I was in the Philippines I found myself researching alot about the history, the culture, the people,etc. I really wasn't all that interested in what the modern Filipino culture had to offer because well, much of it is all the same in North America anyway. Their television programs are a straight bite from American TV. (deal or no deal, survivor, so on and so forth) Huge influence indeed. Even the music was american influenced. Most of the bands I heard perform live did mostly cover songs, very few "original" music, which is sad to me because I am a music freak. I hope I don't get things twisted, because I dont hate America, but come on, I travelled across the Pacific Ocean to see the Philippines, not America.

an essay. esay!

I have always wanted to be an artist, but what kind of artist was always a question. In my first year of high school I needed to make a decision about my studies. A decision that would most likely determine where I would end up 5 years down the line. There I was standing in between the combatants. Passion vs. Career. I placed my bets on a Career
In June of 2002 I graduated from the Technical Vocational High School with an Award of Excellence in the Techincal Drafting field. Confident with my skills as a Draftsman, I decided to take my education to a higher level. I enrolled in the Civil Cad Technology program, and studied Building Design at the Red River College in Winnipeg Manioba. Within two years of studies, I gained valuable knowledge in both Mechanical and Architectural Drafting, proving that my capabilities in the classroom were just what I needed to breakthrough in the workworld. In May 2004 I was hired by Metal Tech Industries, a metal fabrication company who specializes in custom metal designs. After 6 months of serving the company as a draftsman, I was promoted to Head water jet operator, where I programmed a high pressured water machine to make precision cuts according to the designs. The work was tolerable, the income was decent, but all in all it was not excactly what I had in mind as my dream job. Looking around the shop, it came to my attention that I was the youngest employee of the company. I told myself that I did not want to end up working here for the next 15 years. Drained by the repetetive work, the low energy, and lack of enthusiasm in my fellow workers, the only things that kept me sane were the 15 minutes of break time devoted to drawing in my blackbook, or the weekends painting, dancing, and listening to music.
In July 2005 a close friend of mine passed away due to heart failure. He was an artist. A very talented artist. His works inspired me, and his death at such a young age re-directing my focus to the values of life and love. If I am not doing what I love, and loving what I do, then what am I doing here? Surely enough, the long hours at work guaranteed that I would be receiving a secure paycheque after every two weeks, but I became tired of living for just the weekends. I felt as though something were missing.I wanted to create for a living.
Most people will say that the business of being an artist is all based on entrepeneualism. You must be able to be your own boss in order to be successful in the industry. Whether you are doing contract work as an animator, or you sell paintings for a living, or even if you work a stable job at a Graphic Design company. Most people will also say that the school you go to does not matter, but I find that the instructors, and the reputation do hold an advantage over other schools that are as reputable. Upon reviewing the portfolios, and the sample work of AITO graduates I am confident that the faculty members are training the students with the proper guidance. I do not expect AITO to teach me how to create, but I am hoping that through their guidance, that I may build the confidence within myself to push myself as an artist and take my creativity to another level.
To create is to give rise to the unseen, the unheard, the unknown. It is the cause of all existence, and the ever-changing world we live in today. Without the use of imagination, of bright ideas, of opinons and suggestions, evolution would be at a standstill. Historical pages of poetry would be forever monotonous. We would watch re-runs of "Groundhog day", everyday, and the light bulb above our heads would not glow, because everything would be finalized. Above all, I would not be writing this very essay, for if creativity did not exist, there would be no Art Institute that allows one to develop such a skill.
My goal is create my way of living. Untill I can go to work with a smile, and see my work is rewarding to me. Its not always the paycheque but being proud of my work that makes me want to go to work with a smile. I have not as of yet been able to honestly say that I ennjoy my job. With the expection of Art City. I love those kids. I will not stop untill that is what I am doing for a living. I understand that is a very intense course, so I have already begun reading, and drawing, and doing all that I can to prepare for the July start date. I am confident that my drawing skills will help me excell in the Animation course, and my strong will and desire will help me learn the skills and techniques that I do not know.

what a mess

war with oneselfim helpless or atleast thats how it feelslost between satisfied with the bullshit and this doesn't seem realthe wheels of life keep turningand all the learning curves have not straightenedup yetim a lost cause suspected of being a weak subjectsubjected to do immoral thingsthat no real king would ever dare tounprepared i walk through my life scared of the newafraid of being seen nudebut what is there to hide reallyits just my flesh just a piece of flesh like everyone elsesor perhaps im just selfishor perhaps im just so self centereddrawn out of my circle towards the pointedim losttired and aanno yingmyself with all this tirednessone day im wired up the other im tired as sfuckwhat a rutwhat a mess

Surrounded by the profound crowd from downstairswhere uprocking to knockout counts sounds fair feels greatMy head is spinning in that wheels of steels stateI wanna to push my goodfoot to the breaksget up off of that thing with me my mexican baby brotherand make myself feel better while rocking a bill cosby sweaterI wanna sit along the inner circle of the cypherpull an all nighter and watch inner city kids live their life upbecause outside the circle of fire Im sad to say life sucksdeadlines are like major headlines on the follow me around kind of bulletinsIm left behind the hinking what life could have been by nowif only I would have put in less time to lie downand more time to freeze less stress on unecessary school subjects and more focus on how it should be hitting the beatinstead of hitting wall with my fist dear self im sorrybut this college shit has got me pissed studying web scripts that may make no sensefor me nowbut may very well make me dollars laterbecause in the work world that funky goodfoot doesn't get in the doorunless you've got that 8 x ll" non transferable paperso I lay there after practice asking myself is all this hard work worth it.or will my backspin scratch the surface and find more happinessin the struggle??..mmmm eye wonder..

what is there to write about
when writing seems like a job
and the pressure of completing the perfect piece
is weighing heavy on the scale
What ideas come to mind
when time ticks you off like
the big boss looking over your shoulder
do you write about not writing
or do you not write at all
theres 400 dollars waiting for me
at the end of the poem
problem is the poem hasn't even started
...
or has it?
...
has time passed me
like a futuristic history book
where the writings of tommorow
are nothing but sooped up versions
of outlines from yesterday?
Have I collected my half
I use to pass up the queen elizabeths
handed it back when they rated my score as the top one
never willing to drive but always eager to call SHOTGUN!
I would lower my standards to make
those who didn't deserve to be praised feel greater than I was
because I hated the spotlight
never wanted a part of it because It reminded me
of the thin line between dignity and pride
where dignity means staying true to being
the best kept secret
and being proud meant speaking out loud
about how much popularity one has
I went from being the shyest person in the crowd
but I never wanted too be too large
I could have sworn they hated me
The thou shall not poets stared me down like I didn't know a thing
on top of that I got the cold shoulder from
them other poets who could actually sing
I just wanted to free, just speak my piece and leave
want nothing in return but to just be..me
My father told me performing is nothing but a showcase of ego
and thought very little of the idea of living off of poetry
With nobody to back me up but the broke poets themselves
I started to look down at the holes in my shoes,
and the paint splattered pants
and said, fuck..maybe mom and dad were right
maybe I can't do this after all
That's when I started to get back into school
and learned about the digital age
where handwriting on a page isn't worth shit
compared to the glossy prints of a high tech mac
I would turn down show after show if it meant
my ego would explode
but accepted anything to do with children for free of charge
telling myself it was nice, but I should have got paid for this
I tried to save the world with my poetry
with a raised fist at end of my ramble
and a scream at the top of my lungs that echoed revolution
from halifax to vancouver.
but now I see an offer of 400 dollars waiting for me at the end of this poem
Call me a sell out while I call myself a struggling artist trying
to prove his parents wrong about living off of love
I've been doing the volunteer work for years now
show me the money
Give me a 5 dollar bill and I'll write my poetry double sided single spaced
jam packed with life if you think that's how much it's worth,
hand me a queen elizabeth and I'll write out your royalties in rhymeform
to show you how much more depth there is to making words just sound the same
I'll kill your piggy bank, roast it, chew down on some coins
and spit out 2 cents for every time a pimp tosses a dime away
I'll call the I.R.S to collect my treasure chest
apply the pressure to the stress
and tell the poetry fans to sign a check and pay to the order of the poets
the ones lifting your childrens spirits because drugs just aint doing it for them
pay for my college fund so I could be done with web programming bullshit
and get on to saving the world.
Throw me a penny if you think that's what I'm worth
Throw me more if you think I'll save the world
Sign a check if you believe in me
Write me an I.O.U and I'll be fine


show me the money
show me the money
OH WILL SOMEONE JUST SHOW ME THE MONEY!

don't be like me

your mother agrees
that for the sake of keeping your innocence
that you be nothing like me
I mean come on
look at me
what mother would want their son or daughter
to be a poet and an artist
who spends his time chugging down 6 pack of luckys
and smoking fat joints...alone
what mother would allow such a thing
certainly not your mother
your mother knows all about me
she sees the faults
and the mistakes
and exposes them to you everytime
you see me looking out your window
It's no wonder why you never come near me
why at every attempt to break the ice
you just keep turning the cold shoulder on me
your mother knows all about me
shes a pyschic with x-ray eyes
and a 10 foot frame
above me
through me
everywhere but insdie me
she sees
So keep your distance
but when you find fault
in mothers idea of perfection
I will be there
with a sincere smile
some open arms
and ears that were only meant for listening
to everything you have been meaning to ask
about me
The person your mother warned you about
The Poet

Lucky

So here I am.
drunk out of my mind
without a clue as to what to say...
I sit here without a second guess
so I guess its a good thing
that Im drunk?
no.
yes...
maybe..
ohh who gives a shit
this feels very proessional like
you know..
with the computer and all
but who gives a gawdneegoawddamn about what comes out
im a nobody.
a shadow
a dark cloud
a man without a face
what i say does not matter
and you know what
...i like it
i like how it was
when no one recognized the expression as a talent
when they ignored it
thinking that it was just some ridiculour phase
that every high school student seems to go through
im fine with this
no face and all
in face I enjoy it
i could give a fuck about those
who see this as a commidity
im free
cant you see
but then again
without a critic
that entitles me to be untitled
and with no title that means im free to be...stupid
free to make no sense
and oh what a joy is that
to be ignorant and abnoxious
noooo...thats not it
its that i can write and be free
free?
but when your free you dont speak with conviction
and if you don't have conviction
no one is going to believe you
so what if they dont believe me
let them believe what they want to believe
i want some space
some time to be stupid
and aboxoius and ignorant
and i want them to recognize that I am human too
that i make faults
...on purpsoe just to prove that i am everything but alien
that i everything but the best
I want to be picked on just as much as i am praised
because i believe in equality
and if you want to believe in that
more the merrier
the greater it will become
the more that I can write without having to feel
like this is a job
but thats the last thing that i ever wanted from this
to be seen as a hardworker
i just want my wings back
I want to be able to smile when
ideas come naturally flowing through me
i want the universe to play me like an instrument
and shine like the sun instead of spray rain
over every mistake
every unforced error
this is supposed to be fun
so please dont make me feel that i have to prove myself
dont force me to make a decision that i will later regret
dont make me feel more than I am
because im not like those other bigshots
with the 60 inch penises and the long limosines streching from
western canadian to eastern asia
im no bigger than the average
im just right
im not above you
nor beneath you
im just..
and i just want to have my space
my dignity
my respect
my place
my solitute
my peace

peace.