Deadly Trio

A wider balance means it might take longer than most, but I'm confident that I will get there . There where? There!..where the man in the mirror smiles, feeling accomplished in atleast one realm of the artsworld.

I can't say in which order what will comes first, but it's for certain that the album will be done this year. Once I have my album, I can breathe. It's my dream to leave something behind, whether or not it becomes an alltime classic that reaches the limelight, or just an underground jem that sits humbly in the dark corner of your listening booth. I just want to push this out, and I'll be able to move onto my design work with more care, more attention. 12 tracks is the aim for the solo, and 12 for the group project with Manifest Ill, and Visions. If no one's heard of them..they will eventually.

Haven't thought of a solid name yet, but 12 tracks sounds fit for "Working the Clock"

Thus far the list goes..

Intro
1.On my Own
2.Ghost
3. 3 of a Kind
4. Scholar's Mate
5. De Ja Vu
6. Way It Is
Interlude
7. K.I.S.S
8. Queens Gambit (Half done)
9. S.W.I.M (Spoken Word)
10.
11. ?Freedumb
12. ?
Outro

Beats provided by Visions, Kutdown (Foultone/Frek Sho), and my young apprentice, Slotter. Expect that old 95' feel, only with modern day storytelling, combined with a wide range of styles. Overall expect something different, but somewhat familiar.

I'm aiming for May to get it done.
Summer is showtime baby!
The goal this year.. Make good music. Make beautiful art. Travel . Spread the word. and have tons of mad mad fun. I'm not done with my youth just yet, so put that security on hold..

"fEARS" 8x24 Acrylic on Canvas

In the last week before I decided to drop out of the Graphic Design program, I asked around the GD Department for advice to see what others thought about the idea of being in total control, and "going my own route"

Among the people I asked was Francis (I don't know his last name) a second year Graphic Design student at Red River College. After having gone through a similar situation in his previous year of study, where grades in one particular class wasn't up to par with his best expectations, he was able to relate with me much more than any other student I had asked regarding my situation. All in all, his explanations were fair. Tackling it from both sides of the coin, he layed out the pros and cons of staying and going, but at the end of his inspirational speech, I still wasn't convinced that Red River was where I wanted to be. After listening to what his reasons for being in the course were, I left the conversation, under the impression that he was just as lost as many others who were enrolled in the course. That however, is not to say that his reasons for being in the course were pointless or had no meaning or purpose. My argument was simply that, it is possible to achieve equal or even greater success in the design world without a degree from a specialized graphic design institution.

It is my belief that the meaning of success" can be defined in so many different ways, by so many different people, therefore it's true meaning essentially belongs to the individuals who seek it, and not the body of common knowledge who tells us that only through college and university can one reach such a great level of achievement and fulfillment in life.

...

After listening to the opinions of other students, I decided to ask what the Instructors thought of the of whole 'creative independence movement' thang and all the possibilities of obtaining a respected level of professionalism...without the college education. Surpirsingly, two of my instructors were supportive of the idea that a strong portfolio takes precedence over the importance of a diploma when looking for work. Of course, that all depends on what type of work it is. In my case, '(the aspiring illustrators' case), it was excactly what I wanted to hear.

Neil Mcinnes (as shown above), is the bald headed man with the 411 on the Basics of Form. His assignments inspired this "fEARS" piece in such that, the lines represent structure, and movement holds a very similar format to one of the assignments he issued out to us months back. Only difference in this case, is that there is meaning behind this one. The lines painted in this piece represent directions, while the Ear with the big belly-looking figure represents "the body of common knowledge". All the lines move in different directions, but atleast one line connects Francis to the ear, and the ear to Mcinnes. I am not in the picture, simply because I prefer to be outside the box.

Looking ahead,2 or 3 years from where I was then, I saw myself sitting in an office chair glued to a computer screen, internally screaming the words "shoot me now" while designing brochures, and 3 fold pamphlets for some randumb travel agency while reminiscing of all the things I "could have been" if only I applied myself in a different way. I didn't want to be creatively drained after an 8 hour work day, coming home with nothing inspiring to give to the blank canvas sitting at home. Of course, these were all speculative thoughts on the future, but the stories of depressed designers surrounding my big dreams and aspiratoins doomed me and my expecations of its typical work environment. Not long after, did I come to the realization, I would rather work for my art, than let my Art work me. I believe my excact words were " I don't want to sleep on my art, I want to sleep with it, make love to it, and give birth to more creations, without pressure, without fear, and without someone looking for my shoulder to tell me what I am worth.

I wouldn't say that enrolling was a waste of time, and neither would I boast about the claim that school is nothing but bullshit. Like most things in this world, it has its ups and downs. I will say that what I learned for those three months while I was there was well worth it. Had I not been there, I probably would have continued on, parading around, bragging about how I am a designer (look at me!!), when infact, the more I look at my strengths and qualities as someone who creates...I would say that I am a fine artist more than anything. The principles of design have stuck with me, but not fully, and to be quite honest, I like it that way.

In conclusion..At the end of the day, (in this Box we live in) it's about how much money you make to get by with, but at the end of this precious, precious lifetime, it has nothing to do with money, but rather everything to do with heart. Balance is Key, as I will continue to say from this day forth. Therefore I SHALL PROCEED. (yes indeed!) to find the fine line between designer and fine artist, combining sharp technical precision with the finesse passion and creativity to create this beautiful path ahead of me. Both are essential, but ultimately, for me, it is the voice in the heart that speaks louder than the voices in the mind.

"...without fEAR...

listen to your heart"

A"N"D DA MAN

January 1st. 2009
Enter the madMAN
the 'always in the lab'
'too busy right now '
'mmm.. I'll call you back- MAN
the -"focused on design'
beats rhymes and life
'hand me a pen
because that was good!

so I've got to write it down NOW!!!' -MAN
the 'silent, sober, wildcard

why so serious? jokester
going over the top
with too much negative thought
but refuses to get caught up

in the bullshit'-MAN
the 'hardworking
soul searching
forever learning

no more grass burning
rather play the background

hip hop fan /slash/ driver
who aspires to be LIVE-er
plus wiser than bud -MAN

The 'I don't give give a fuk

about your lack of support'
"yes I can"
"yes I will"
highly skilled,

self taught,
won't stop
till I fullfill my dreams" MAN
the Real MAN
who doesn't kill but BUILDS and..
and...
and...
and...
...
AND...

...Man

MaskerAid

Eye could see clearly now. The rain is gone. Eye could see all obstacles in my way...

Dom Da-da. Dom Da DA

1 week of Japanese Art

..Inspiring.

Note to Self. Next time you see Mr. Proper snap his fingers, clean your room, and buy folders, and organizers for your supplies.

Heavy Duty

Future is looking bright?

With New years around the corner, people have been waiting eagerly to begin their resolutions for the upcomming 2009 year. I say, "why wait?". Who needs a holiday to tell you how to celebrate, or set goals to re-evaluate your lifestyle and integrate new strategies on how to live a more promising one .It's best to just get started already.

Number 1 on my list is Organize. If it's anything I've learned from Time Management class, it's that organization is the ultimate time saver. * note to self. list of things to do: start a list of things to do.

*Second Note to self, the next time you read this.. you owe yourself 40 pushups, 20 chinups, and a ten minute stretch. Drink lots of water, and eat more vegetables.

but first.. go to sleep!

Above the Clouds

If only eye had a canon EOS digital rebel xti 400D cam, I would be doing the same as you little lady. Taking snapshots of flying rabbits, and other neat subjects flying in the sky. Oh so tempting. Buy or save? Buy or save?

spread love, not disease

Planet Earth

Society is Ugly. The world is beautiful. Pick this up next time you see it in a store. Education is worth the money.

Merry Boxing Day

Knock! Knock...

After every single trial,
and every single failed attempt
to invite you back in ...
eye have finally summoned SOME strength
to place my frozen hands
upon this back door ,
and just SHUT IT!
-but-but-BUT IT'S..hard
yes i'll admit it, it's hard...
my cold hands tremble at the same pace
as my mind races back to moments of ..
unexpected '4 in the morning' visits where
eye would show up sleeping
on the welcome mat of your front porch
beside your beloved wildstyle cat Jelly
where he would whisper non sensical things to me like ...
"meeeeeeeeeeoooooooooow"
as eye...

would dose off (zzzzzzzzzzzoe)
into my dreamworld picturing myself
reciting thousand word love poems
while laying there beside you
[ and not your cat ]
...It's moments like that
that have my hands
stuck to this door like crazy Glue
even with new faces coming through
the entrance way asking me to lend a hand
I just can't seem to move
...eye am stuck to you..
and now..in the midst of my relapse
self proclaimed friends scream

like mad basketball coaches
from the basement of my home
telling me to Wake UP!
saying such things like
"there is no such thing as love"
"Get over it"

"close the door!"
or "pick up your damn paintbrush!"
"Theres more fish in the sea"
"let it go"

"oh just let it be"
"this ain't slumdog millionare
There is no such thing as destiny!!"
...My trembling hands curl into fists
as eye screen more calls

and then release...

back to open palms,

CALM.. as eye drift off

to "hi la-la!!"-land
where I'm reminiscent of..
home made cookies,
grocery lists,
school textbooks,
boxes full of old compact discs
african heritage,
rumble fish
and bruce lee as a kid,
sweet kisses,
warm showers,
cuddling,
studying
and chuckling

..at that funny chinese kid
with the big bag of chips .
meditation,
ginseng tea
heart to heart talks by the river
and fun, climbing on trees (like mountain goats!!)
yes, I reminisce..
of quiet bike rides through parks
after dark
fat markers
aerosol cans
and street art
organized konfusion,
AIR
line dancing ,
breakin',
requests to cut your hair,
and reasons not to,
21 candles,
clothes,
and so much more unecessary

(not as important as what was inside)

-materialistic things

-eye bought you
yes I reminisce ..

of that,

that,

that,

(that too!)

..and this..
of memories that make my finger,
between the ring and middle
-twitch
all this while eye wonder ..
why these pieces didn't ever fit?

Perhaps my home wasn't a safe place to stay??

maybe i'm worth nothing but a visit

...whatever the case...

EYE KNOW

I've got a lot of cleaning to do

but so do you..

..

you've been gone for some time now

doing what you say you MUST do

living "a life of you own"

the way you ought to

(but eye don't know if eye should trust you)

either way what I say doesn't seem to go through

so who am eye to argue?

eye guess theres nothing left

for me to say to you

-but this..

wherever you at.

Paix et Lumiere et Amour,

eye wish you safe travels

(even if you wish me the opposite)

my hand is on the knob...

..and im closing this door..

but in case you ever come back..

just know..

eye am NOT locking it..

Listen!

J-Dilla - La La La
everytime eye listen to beats, eye think.."soundtrack to my life"

J-Dilla - Look of Love Pt. 1

Rocking is the shit!

eye love this. Never get sick of watching this.

Ekundayo one of my favorite superheroes in the world.

ALL eye NEED.

You're all that eye need
eye'll be there for you
if you keep it real with me
eye'll keep it real with you
..HIP HOP...
damn right you know how eye do
represent you to the fullest
and forever stay true. ..

Till death do us part eye do my part in this underground business
as a third-eye witness on the scene where crimes are committed everyday
from the corner of this worldly box
eye watch undercover snakes take a big bite out of my plate
on full stomachs, these fools plummet
while eye stay starving for my food for thought
(not like those cock suckers) talking trash
with hands up their ass like sock puppets
now if you think I'll sell out like them ha-ha fuk dat !
my style stays rugged like R.A..ALwAYS
even through the darkest days eye remain humble as can be
call me a cross between scarface and Mahatma Ghandi
balance is the key (...the way it oughta be) ..
through this beautiful struggle eye bleed lyrics on beat
hip hop = my form of therapy to find inner peace
without it, eye doubt that eye would make it this far
it made me look inside the mirror and appreciate GOD
and for that, eye could neva go back like Special ED
yo, you know how eye do..stay true untill eyem dead
and when I'm gone, I'll still live on through all the songs ive made
to make the future generation stop and contemplate
..about life, and how some shit is just 'knot right'..
like so many untalented emcees all up in the spotlight
indeed eye exist here to give clear meaning to
carriers of the torch
who MUST..
.. keep it true.

some shit eye wrote this morning...

Im tired of living this bullshit life making no progress
feels like a condom on my brain
because Im fucking with more nonsense
my guilty conscience-
-being framed for all the wrong things
but if you think I'll stop here,
sorry but eye will NOT quit
eye stay on top like a stock tip
inspired by life's conflicts
to show you kids what hip hop is to me
..hip hop is deep,
like pops' philosophies
you gotta read between my enemy lines
to see what I mean
...and yes, I got dreams
but only half have seen the light of day
other half's been locked away
inside my hiding place
for so long Ive rambled on about how
"I aint got shit to prove"
but with some of those lies you listen to
eye realize.. "eye do"
"with great power comes great responsibility"
so be impeccable with your word
because the world is listening
know the ledge, with no regrets,
plus know your history
and know that there is more to life
than trying to make fifty G's
what's inside means more
than what you represent physically
and I'll hit you in the head with a shovel
if you ain't digging these
words of wisdom (wordlife)
you need to learn to listen
close your eyes for a second
and work with your THIRD vision

Declaration of Hard Word and Determinatoin

Eye Nereo II, artist and poet who aspires to be greater than great, hereby declare that on this day forth, eye shall invest greater care into my art which eye so passionately love with all that is left of my broken heart. For as long as I will strive, I will expand, and grow, which is the ultimate goal. The only thing to do from here on out is to create, and at best...without fear. (at best!)